Review Dec, 06

Let’s take a moment to speak hypothetically:

Hypothetically, let’s say that last class period (which we’ll assume could’ve been a B day) started off with a certain imaginary student (whom we’ll dub “Joshuo Blanca,” for purely speculative purposes) actually remembering to do the theoretical quality-writing post he may or may not have been assigned, and perhaps doing it with such skill and eloquence that his imaginary classmates could possibly have been moved to hypothetical tears. Next, to further our purely imaginative scenario, let us assume that an essay test about a made-up book which we’ll call The Angry Fruit, by Johnny Steinbecker, might have purportedly been on the theoretical teacher’s hypothetical agenda for this imaginary class period, but that some ridiculously improbable occurrence (completely hypothetical, of course), such as the aforementioned hypothetical essays spontaneously bursting into purely theoretical flames, prevented this fictional test from taking place. Speaking in a wholly imaginative context, let’s pretend that perhaps this fictional teacher (A Mrs. Mountainstead, for lack of a better name) interprets the possible spontaneous combustion as an omen from a theoretical “higher-power” of some sort, which I feel compelled to call “Dog.” Perhaps she decides, as a result, that instead of her imaginary test, she will reward all her “studious” and “hard-working” students (work with me here) with some hypothetical gelato (let’s also assume, for the heck of it, that this just happens to be the day that the Italian government declares will be National Free Gelato Day for all perpetuity).

Now, hypothetically, what flavor ice-cream would you get?

Unfortunately, I have it on good authority (namely my own) that last class period actually began with some forgetful (but otherwise fantastic) student (me) failing to deliver their piece-of-quality writing at all. This was apparently followed by a Grapes of Wrath essay test (the kind that doesn’t spontaneously combust) which I’m sure we all passed with flying colors *cough*. Afterwards, we drew names for our book-giving game, which is kind of like a Secret Santa thing, except instead of presents we get…novels… Yay. Finally, we were handed our next reading assignment, Life of Pi, a book about an Indian boy stranded on a lifeboat in the middle of the Pacific Ocean with a Bengal tiger for company. No, really.